Who knows my Instagram Account might think that my hair loss is absolutely no issue for me and I'm bursting with self-confidence. But that's only partially true. Yes, I share pictures of myself without a topper and show my hair loss to a huge audience. However, I would never walk out the door without a topper. I get a lot of letters on Instagram from women with hair loss asking me how I deal with the issue so openly and confidently. What these women usually don't know: I've been suffering from hair loss for 18 years. That's more than enough time to come to terms with it and at least try to accept yourself for who you are. Still, it would be a lie to say that I'm always happy with the way I look and never struggle with it.
The fact that I can be so open about it resulted from a change in my appearance. Only since I found the hair replacement that makes me look normal, I can accept myself as I am. Specifically, this means that for 13 years I tried everything to hide my thinning main hair. That I cried for every single hair in the brush, on the floor and in the shower hair strainer. That I felt ugly and unattractive. That I felt less feminine and like a defect exempar. That's how I thought and felt for many, many years. I often asked myself why this had to happen to me, felt sorry for myself and hedged myself in. But at some point I had enough of it. They say that hair roots cannot be reactivated after about 10 years of inactivity - so I had to accept that my hair was lost and that my appearance would not change for the better either.
Acceptance is the first step
Hope is actually a good thing. But when it comes to accepting your situation, it's counterproductive. It wasn't until I had finished trying to change something about my hair loss that I was able to come to terms with it. What I keep reminding myself is this: I only have this one life and I am responsible for making it the best it can be. So I can spend all day mourning my lost hair, or I can do something to find my reflection in the here and now more beautiful. The purest form of self-acceptance, of course, is to love yourself as you are. Bald, with thinning hair, with all the "flaws". That is the freestyle and I admire all women who can do that. I'm not there yet. For me, my toppers are still indispensable to find myself attractive. But I also think it's legitimate. Others have their fingernails done, wear push-up bras, get extensions or have their breasts enlarged. I think it's all fine as long as it doesn't harm anyone else.
Breaking the taboo of hair replacement
Many women see hair replacement as something absolutely negative. I can relate to that - I felt the same way at first. When my father suggested that I consider wearing a hairpiece when I was 20, I was anything but thrilled. Wigs, hairpieces, toupees - none of that is sexy. It's not feminine and it's certainly not normal! I would like to change this image. I would like alternative hair (as it is called in English) to be seen as something normal. Why should I be ashamed of wearing hairpieces? Why does it have to be something that is kept a secret? Why should I be worth less just because I have hair loss? I just don't want to feel that way anymore, and that decision makes all the difference. Your inner attitude towards hair loss (or even other, much worse diseases) determines how well you cope with it in everyday life. The sooner you accept your current situation, the less it will weigh on you emotionally. And please get rid of the idea that hairpieces and wigs are something to be ashamed of. They are not, and anyone who makes you feel that way is - if you'll pardon the expression - an asshole!
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